Thoughts (Rated E)
*
All Thoughts and Rants are mine, unless otherwise noted.
Splinter Burst
What Is Needed
Cause and Effect: Pause Incessant
Dollars And Sense
Imp-lication
Need To Know
Recuse The Excuse Refuse
Unofficial Interstitial Superficiality
Ammo-nation
Tear-or-ism
Reality Chegg
"Big" American
Know You, Do It
Dis Time
Decree Of Civility
The Big POT Conspiracy
IS To Begin
Chival-really

Rants (Rated R)
No...
NLOL Pets
Right Barack After This
Anorexiuggh
FemNazi FauxPas
Death Taxable
Core Rejuvenation
Shut Up And Drive, Hilton Wanna-bes
123=ESI
I, Zy, Try
Fat Asses: Boon Of The Fittest
Double Standards
Unofficial Interstitial Superficiality
Misduhwrecktions
Clock Aft Menu


START
Splinter Burst
  
It is in this type of occurrence that all the metaphysics and quantum mechanical dynamics amount to nothing in the way of any type of rational explanation. Life decides to empty its trials upon your head like a shampooer with palsy. Not that the situation in the analogy is unpleasant; but, the "feeling" is comparable. And palsy is an excellent metaphor when it comes to the illogical reactions that occur when emotion takes control. Have we, as a global "society", evolved into solipsistic, existential nihilists? Where the best reason to do something is whatever course of action satiates our primal, carnal and feral urges? It sounds as if we are forcing regression in order to quell our fears of "what is yet to come". Why do we pay our actors, politicians and athletes more than our scientists, teachers and farmers? An actor is someone who puts on a mask to portray an alternative persona, a politician will insist on the validity of his positions while knowing full well their inefficacies, and an athlete (while being remarkable in their physical abilities) will only focus on the one action in which they specialize. Sounds like a phony, a liar and a one track mind (to me). None of the aforementioned character traits are ones which I would like to adopt for my own. Instead, I will be like our underpaid "background" people, who discover the next generation's tools and cures. I will be like those who assure the wisdom of the future while struggling to make ends meet. And I do contribute agriculture to my community, presently. Yet, in the process of this renewal, I shall not be what too many have been or are destined to become. I will not be apologetic for my convictions based on logic and truth. I will not play the ineffectual run around games. I will not be meek in my defense of what is wise and proper. I have much better things to do with my thoughts and time than cater to people's insecurities. I shall focus my attention on that which enriches and feeds our pure needs, not our chaotic imagined wants. I will be an angel, a shaman, an alchemist and a guide. I have no needs that are not met by the blessings bestowed upon every living moment. I shall exist to enhance our being and if you must deny your assistance in contribution to the growth of your own species, then I must leave you lying upon your shadow. By no means should you ever try to slow me down or negatively distract my attentions. The consequences of said actions may well extend into the "most dire" category. So, depart with a seed of truth, a morsel of reality and a grain of salt. Then, after lunch, you must learn how to grow...
What Is Needed
As a seed demands continuous nourishment, so does the aged tree. A union was formed under the belief that freedom was inherently essential to the harmonious cultivation of individual growth. The reality of the situation becomes infuriatingly apparent when we find an assemblage of persons who, when faced with adversity, seem to have lost their will to fight and their desire to work. According to the laws of basic physics, (thermodynamics to be technical), a body in motion will stay in motion while a body at rest will stay at rest. Simple truth.
Now, imagine a body where many capable parts are either misused or choose not to function properly and/or to their full potential. The reasons wear onward as the time runs out. Inevitably, you begin to cast blame. Well, stupid people this and poor people that... blah, blabity blah. It's obviously much easier to point a finger than to lend a hand (man, I should write that down-hehe). I imagine it's also very difficult to do a hula dance dismembered. Although graphic, the previous statement was intended to personify the situation of us. Us as in US of A. "...Divided we fall" is putting it quite lightly. It's more like, " How the hell are we still standing?"
In light of all this bloggity, perhaps, we should think of ourselves like a big anthill (ooh, an Aesop's metaphor coming). Instead of focusing on the frivolities (as the grasshopper did), maybe we should focus on the mechanics of a proper societal structure. It's not about socialism or capitalism or racism or any of the stupid-dumb 'ism' words of the old world. In fact, screw the old world fat cats and big wigs, anyway. Let's try something new, since they can't seem to put us anywhere better.
How about universal healthcare- people could routinely be examined and their health maintained properly instead of waiting 'til the pain causes blindness.
How about complete education focus and reform- all children could get top notch l'arnin' at top notch schools... America's schools.
How about more stringent funds distribution- where people are paid what they're worth, not what they're willing to take to be quiet.
Most importantly, we need to forget all the philosophies of our forefathers' that no longer apply to present day. There is no more need for racial tension, sexist media portrayals, illogical violence or double talk politickin'. There is no more need for unquestioned financial assistance, illiterate youth, unnecessary imprisonment or uninhibited laziness. There is no more need for excuses, complaints or bullshite.
All in all, we're getting older as a country, here. It's about time we grew up and stopped acting like it's always someone else's fault. It wasn't the weather, the wars, the economy, the internet, the unemployment or the malnutrition. Our biggest problem was (and still is) the desire to get it all for nothing. It's time to rebuild our wigwams and we've wandered into a desert of complacency and apathy. How are we ever gonna "grow"?
Peace out or Piss off- do something, America....

Cause and Effect: Pause Incessant
Who are you to know yourself? If all perspective takes place in the past, then, perhaps, that also negates the future. Memories (all) mould the fibers of our being as we subjectively edit. Of course, you can't help being subjective when looking within, now can ya? We long for the ideal objectives we've decided are priority. This emotion, coupled with the inevitable first person view, causes an immediate pseudo-paradox. Should I stop being myself long enough to examine my own mind or should I continue being myself and hope my feelings don't cloud my judgement? I figure, it's probably all happening on some microscopic agenda. Therein enters the destiny/fate conundrum. Why would me not being me to see me actually be the me I need to see? Go ahead, one more time, read the fairly cohesive previous statement. (Works a lot of ways, kiddies.) So, the next time you decide to really figure you out, stop and think... or don't. Doesn't matter because you are who you are and you should just be what you be. Pardon the syntax and mind your own business... or don't.

Dollars And Sense
Common sense is no longer common. Excuses and ill-founded complaints run frivolously rampant, while blue collars are taxed and impeded continuously by a government that will not swallow its pride and admit that it needs help. As of late, I've had this same exact problem. Well, no more. My pride is gone. Now is the time to realize that we must knock down our decaying foundations to rebuild anew. This, of course, is drawn directly from my own recent personal realizations. Yes, it's a scary notion. How will we know if this "change" is going to work the way we need? Well, it's either: Begin to gently pull down the condemnable aspects OR Wait until they crash down upon our heads. It's that simple. Your choice, my choice... OUR choice.

Imp-lication
There must be more. There can't be any less. The normal games and SOP are irrelevant. I lack interest in the commonplace. I'm becoming frustrated with the boredom and insinuations of superficiality. My value is indeterminate according to the usual measures. I seek elite individuality, not the portrayal of difference. Time is too valuable to imagine stagnation. A break might be in order. Realize that the unknown is only so because of the inability to learn appropriate responses...

Need To Know
What do we need to know? Do we need affirmation? Do we need courtesy? Is it really that important to know what someone else thinks about any given situation? Or is the 'need to know' directly linked to how much we care? Is it offensive to deny curiosity in the name of honor? To what extent is this action applicable to intimate conversation?
Life is a cyclical series of interactions mixed with perspective. The value of a true friend is often displayed by praise and trust. Honesty is essential to camaraderie as much as positivity is crucial to togetherness.
* I only wish to know the limits of my boundaries, then ask myself whether or not those parameters are acceptable for comfort...* 

Recuse The Excuse Refuse
At what point do we begin to believe our own hype? Is there a definitive happenstance where vague "justification" becomes irrefutable evidence? The logic structures that we hold to be self-evident must involve evidence of logic that exists beyond subjective reasoning. The blind can not see because there is an actual limitation inherent in a mechanism. The blindfolded cannot see because there is a temporary hindrance to their abilities. Now, if we insist that bc we cannot see we are blind, we invoke logical fallacies of the most elementary nature. In Latin it's referred to as "post hoc ergo propter hoc", which (loosely translated) means "this after therefore this before", aka "correlation implies causality". This is false, just as much as "cum hoc ergo propter hoc" or "correlation proves causality". Those who fear "judgment" will consistently misdirect assertions by attacking the words and phrases used to question them. It is not proven that this tactic is entirely unsuccessful; though, I'm sure this is due to the fact that using illogic to attack logic creates an inability to create cohesive cooperation of logics. Chess?  

Unofficial Interstitial Superficiality
I blame the search engines and spam generators for the superficiality addiction of the common person. It seems that there are so many "armchair quarterbacks" anymore, no one realizes the depth of any given topic. As the Industrial Revolution came to a close, we shifted our attentions to hunting down our whims and gathering rudimentary factoids via electronic mediums. We became a world of snap judges, bull sh*tters and con artists. In fact, we believe our own hype so much that we often mindlessly "channel surf" through everything in our lives. Why sit still and watch a sunset when you can jump on the Internet and speed up the frames in High Definition? (Yes, I realize the irony of blogging about this.) We rush around, multitasking to the nth degree, overloading our senses with meaningless and trivial propagandas. Guess what? We're missing out on life.
It's way too obvious when you actually pay attention. Pharmaceutical companies sell sleeping pills and awake pills. It's common to see someone glued to a lighted screen (in whatever fashion possible), even at social gatherings. Impulse purchases are as commonplace as irrelevant flashing adverts on websites. Information overload may have already reached a critical mass for all of us. Sure, we know a little bit about everything we're interested in but, we don't do anything with it. We've developed psychological symptoms that are more akin to the blubberings of infants than actual mature problems. Are you tired, distracted, unhappy, too happy, overly energetic, bored, lackluster, emotional, human? Don't worry. Instead of dealing with your problems... there's a pill for that.
Meanwhile, it's painfully apparent where our loyalties lie. We are a nation of attention deficient, excuse making, instantly gratifying, wasteful, immature, selfish, lazy hummingbirds that flit from topic to topic like the only thing that matters is that we're distracted from actually having to do something worthwhile. And, hey, I'd finish this little rant but I can't...bc my show's on. ;}  (didjagetit?)

Ammo-nation
First, I believe in the second amendment. It's pretty clear, to me, that a nation, comprised of citizens that are unable or unwilling to protect themselves, is doomed to invasion (of one kind or another). The ridiculous lobbyists that propose extreme gun control are using the type of illogic that really squeezes my trigger. There are only a couple of good reasons to have a gun- protection and hunting. That being said, here are a few "in sights" that may just clarify the problems that should be "targeted".
1)"Be aware of your surroundings"-
 Urban citizens should be strictly regulated. The reason: other than shooting another human being, they have no real purpose for owning firearms. Because many of the "anti-gun" idiots come from cities, they only see the "truth" of their immediate environment (i.e. criminals in cities only have guns for the above reason). They also realize that the potential for collateral damage is much greater if you can't see fifty feet in all directions. The farther into the "country" that you travel, however, the more this logic breaks down- which brings up my second point.
2)"Identify, aim, squeeze, check"-
 Rural people use guns for good reason. Other than protection, guns are used to provide food for American families. Most are well educated in firearms safety and usually... eat what they kill. Waste not, want not and all that jazz. They realize that they should know what they're shooting, make a clean shot and track what they shot down. I really dislike these "gangsta" fools that spray an area, killing countless innocent bystanders, just because they don't have the balls to confront their opponent. Gun control means using both hands, losers.
3)"Use as directed"-
 Alright, I've covered location, purpose, safety and responsibility a bit. Now, it's time to talk about the two reasons I stated in the introduction paragraph- protection and hunting. We should be allowed to protect our homes, families and possessions as needed. We should also be allowed to shoot things we are going to use to provide sustenance. We should NOT have firearms for any of these reasons: fear, image, intimidation, terrorism, etc. If you have a gun because you're worried that your neighbor has a gun, you're wrong. If you own a gun because you think it's cool or you're "overcompensating", you're stupid. If you own a firearm because you want to make people respect you, you're a prick. And, last but not least, if you carry a piece for any reason that causes panic and/or threatens peace- turn it around in your hand, look closely and do us all a favor- pull a fast one on yourself.
NRA GUN SAFETY:
1) Know your target and what is beyond it.
2) Know how to use the gun safely.
3) Be sure the gun is safe to operate.
4) Use correct ammo for your gun.
5) Wear protection if needed.
6) Never use alcohol or drugs when using your firearm.
7) Store guns away from unauthorized persons (i.e. children, mentally challenged and criminals).
*As with any dangerous material, proper handling is a necessary responsibility.*

Tear-or-ism
"The calculated use of violence (or the threat of violence) in order to attain goals that are political, religious or ideological in nature; this is done through intimidation or coercion or instilling fear." <---This is the rough definition of terrorism. Those that perpetrate the actions set forth above are, by definition, terrorists. There is no distinction regarding the location or nationality of the perpetrators. "Home grown" is just as culpable as "foreign" when it comes to those who spread terror. Individuals who adopt an "eye for an eye" mentality will inevitably... fail to see.
Now, let's consider the tactics used by fanatics to disseminate dissent amongst their "peers" and, eventually, anyone within earshot. First, we have vague arguments filled with the intentional alteration of cliche sentiments. Then, we have slanderous effrontery, mainly comprised of demeaning and/or belittling harassment. Next, comes the overly exaggerated "herd mentality" agenda, which pushes the "with us or against us" propaganda. Following that, we find the true beginning of terrorism- the intention of using force to alter the health, wealth or wisdom of anyone who disagrees with the "doctrine" of our activities. Finally, the force itself is displayed in full effect as attacks are made to violently "change someone else's world".
So, let's consider the terrorist that may exist within each one of us, shall we? Do we ever act like we "know" when our information is fed to us through the tubes of propaganda? Do we feel "justified" in being derogatory, simply because we disagree? Are we ultimately insecure enough with ourselves that, instead of using sense to argue a point, we must bare our teeth and snap at anything that looks differently? Would we rather sit around and complain, like the members of a "sewing circle", then actually undertake a constructive/ positive means to an end?

If you answered "yes" to any of the previous paragraph's questions- shame on you, bc you're a terrorist bully. And, if not, then bully for you. Remember: Although you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, you can't assume that your vinegar is sweet bc you have a lot of flies buzzing. Sometimes, the amount of flies is directly proportional to the amount of shit you create. And, honestly, not all shit makes good fertilizer for anything... anywhere. So, smell yourself, examine your flies, take a long bath and kiss your "non-sense" goodbye. Tanks.

Reality Chegg
I'm tired of the insipid metaphors that are often posed as questions. Like: if a tree falls in the woods, does it make a sound? Or, which came first- the chicken or the egg? The first one hints at quantum theory and the effects of observation as connected with the "laws" of physics; but, the second one is simply a prelude to fanatical religious debates. So, I'll answer both for you- the first one, slightly sarcastically and, the second one, realistically. Please try to follow my rambling logic(s).
First, when a tree falls in the woods and there are "observers"/ "listeners" present, it most certainly makes a sound. The "question" arises simply because an assumption must be made if there are no "ears" to record the event. Many have argued this conundrum, based on the fact that neither can "show proof". Therefore, the only real "answer" is "pick a side and realize that- nobody cares".
Second, we must deal with the "creation vs evolution" spat (which is ridiculous to me bc I believe in both theories and the basis for the entire "debate" is a misunderstanding of Darwinian principles). So, which came first? Well, if you're a creationist, it's pretty simple- the chicken. This is bc "they" believe a "greater power" manifested an "end product". Fine, that's just fine. Now, if you're an "evolutionist", it gets complicated. Logic like- well, there had to be a chicken to lay an egg but there must've been an egg to make the chicken that laid the egg is "cyclic ridiculousness".
Let's imagine for a moment that "evolution" took place (in one way or the other). Ultimately, there would have to be an entity that laid an egg that produced the first chicken. And the egg that produced the first chicken would have been laid by something very similar to a chicken, but... to be fair, we must "fine line define" exactly what we consider to be a chicken. Having done so- its predecessor- that was not an "exact" chicken (although sharing many similarities), constructed an egg of its own genetic material to produce "chicken prime". Well, you say, there was a chicken in the egg, so doesn't that make it a "chicken egg"? No, it doesn't. Let's apply the laws of logic here, particularly one called, "cum hoc ergo propter hoc" or "with this, therefore because of this". This can be applied to the idea of a "chicken egg" and I'm not going to spell it out bc it's fairly obvious (look it up, if you want further explanation). The only possible outcome for either side is- the chicken. The M.Fin' chicken came first. Now, if you'll excuse me...I'm off to devour a bit of both parts of this conundrum.

<PS> Arguing over ridiculous theories, that can't be answered, makes me hungry...

"Big" American
'This is the United States of America'. What does that declaration conjure in your mind? Does it summon waving flags, baseball and cowboys? Does it make you dream of success, opportunity and freedom? Or could you really care less, as long as you get your biscuits? Personally, I don't know what to think anymore. I'm a die-hard patriot who loves the purity of the ideals upon which our country was based (i.e. liberty, justice and hot dogs). However, I see too many "Americans" who are guided by their vices (greed, fear, sloth, gluttony, anger, etc.). We have become one "big" melting pot of hatemongers and sissies. Now, to be fair, there are plenty out there who fight valiantly for their country and their beliefs but, even more who are addicted to being "big". What do I mean, you ask? I mean BIG. We are run by Big Oil, Big Pharm, Big Money, Big Tobacco, Big Media, Big Religion and Big Auto. Did I get them all? Let's see- we like to burn fuel, do drugs, spend cash, smoke stuff, watch tv, excuse ourselves and go where we want. Did I miss any? Sure I did.
How about Big Science, Big Education, Big Technology, Big Charity and Big Conservation? No? Why are we "leading" in all the destructive "bigs" and failing in the "constructive"? I wrote previously about actors, athletes and "it-people". It seems the only thing America wants to know about is who can play well, who can play better and who can play pretend. When will we, as a nation, stop "playing" around? Please forgive my cynicism today. I was just "blocked" by Jesus, here on FB. I'm feeling kinda dark. Here's the reality: we need to go back to work. As a country (and on a differential timeline), we're at that point in the "celebration" where drunk people start knocking over furniture, half drunk people start picking fights, someone's car gets backed into and some guy is pissing in the hall closet. Time to close the doors, get some rest, wake up and clean up all of the "aftermath". It's time to remember why we became a country in the first place. It's time to be proud of ourselves again...and we ain't gonna do it by snorting terrorism, popping blame and downing immigrants. It's gotta be a little nap, then some breakfast, then on to the long neglected "to dos".

Know You, Do It
You are unique. I do not mean that in a patronizing or assumptive manner but, merely, as a definitive observation. You know who you are. The thoughts that form your inner monologue, the quirks that define your character and the emotions that guide your soul... fit you well. I see that you can see. I think you know what you think you know. There is nobody quite like you, at all. Sure, there are those who resemble you in myriad areas of existence. Yet, you are you and you know it, don't you?
Do not feign ignorance when it comes to the faults of your personality. Do not believe that the only answers are those that you might understand. There are mysteries that the subjective mind cannot know. There are problems that the "self" cannot solve without the "all". The part needs the whole and vice versa.

Dis Time
Society has become dissociative in its interactions (yes, I know that's quite "jumbo shrimp" or oxymoronic to say). We spend hours of our time existing vicariously through the "amateur" characters of "reality" television (not to mention sitcoms and soaps). We spend more time hiding behind our screens than we ever spend in public. Our self-image becomes one of disconnected facades, perpetrated solely to show the world our strengths, as we see fit. Is it any wonder that strangers rarely look each other in the eye anymore?
We're too busy trying to trick the rest of the world into believing our "side" of the story- without ever needing to worry about being wrong. Why (not worry)? We control our bubble, that's why. It's easy and "safe" to sit behind a computer screen or a cell phone and speak our minds freely. There aren't too many "actual" social repercussions if we "troll" the chat rooms and talk all kinds of garbage to anonymous avatars. In "virtual" Earth, we can be as cool as we think we are... bc nobody can prove us wrong.
I grow weary of this dissociative, disconnected, disingenuous, disgusting disarray. I say, come say that to my face. Sign a waiver of liability. See how far your opinion reaches when you're choking on your eyebrows. Maybe, I'll agree... or maybe I'll be too busy tweeting about #ingyourface. (How many, reading this, actually typed that into Twitter?) My point remains- we will not be enslaved by machines. We are already dependent upon them. The Matrix is not a hell for the enlightened but nirvana for the lazy and fearful. Is there an Internet religion yet? Have you logged your prayers on live feed today?

Try it. Try going one day without using ANY electronics. No cell phone, no computer, no car, no toaster, no blender, no stove, no microwave, no PDA, no radio, no TV (in fact, destroy your TV- period). I won't say anything about faucets and fridges. So, your avatar is a level 7856 glitterassnapkin in the world of boreshaft. Ooh, I'm impressed. When you look back on your life, will you remember that time you beat the level three boss on that really stupid RPG or will you regret failing to live? Stop dis crap. 

Decree Of Civility
This is a general statement of intention as well as one of observation. Many of the following points will coincide with each other. This should only strengthen the necessity of their recognition. Most apply to every facet of life itself and, as such, should be viewed with that respect. Asterisks surround ideals that may help in the negation of the negativity.
---------
1)    Sarcasm- *There’s no point in being pointed without a good point.*- Being rude does not accomplish anything but delay in the communication of positive ideas.
2)    Complaints (unnecessary) - *It could be worse.* There are times when complaints are necessary for reconfiguring situational problems. Other than that, vocalization of complaints (aka “griping”) only creates stress for others.
3)    Pity (self) - *Many have done more with less.* - The fact that you can understand that which bothers you, should be proof enough that it’s not that bad.
4)    Blame (excuses) - *Actions speak louder than words/ Talk is cheap.* - You really can’t prove that what you’re saying is truth until you show your work on the subject. Armchair quarterbacks seem to know everything but, when was the last time they ran drills?  
5)    Disregard (narcissism) - *There’s no I in team* - If you care about those around you, you should think about how you affect them, not how you can affect their actions.
6)    Pride (improper) - *It goes before destruction*. – There are times when pride is righteous then, there are times when it will isolate and ruin those who can’t swallow it.
7)    Anger- *Only destruction happens when you “blow up”.* - There is rarely truly righteous anger, if any at all. If you can’t take the heat, get out of the kitchen.
8)    Jealousy (all) - *The grass is always greener.* - If you’re envious of somebody else, you have entirely too much time on your hands and/or too much focus on yourself.
9)    B**ch moves- *Say what you mean, do what you say.* - There are times where any of the above “feelings” may affect you. This is human. However, your actions following said “affecting” will define your character. If you mumble, back stab, talk sh*t, scheme or nitpick- you’re a b*tch. Period.
*Please accept this decree as a personal statement of etiquette. We should all endeavor to adhere to the principles set forth (i.e. NOT partaking in the aforementioned and numbered negativity). There are, quite possibly, more actions we can deem inappropriate as civilized members of society. Please feel free to add them. Thanks and remember: Be good, do good, feel good, get good…

The Big POT Conspiracy
We've become a nation of distracted addicts. We like our brains fuzzy and our lives filled with superficial excitement (this doesn't apply to everyone, of course, but please bear with me). We spend billions of dollars a year downing little pills for depression, anxiety, restless legs, attention deficiency, insomnia, etc. We drive vehicles that burn natural resources and emit harmful pollutants into the air we breathe. Many of us are hopelessly addicted to burning little white paper tubes filled with a useless plant and hundreds of poisons. We are slaves to the Bigs. In this note, I'll speak about the three Bigs that I just described- Pharma, Oil and Tobacco (or P.O.T.). What did you think I was going to talk about here? ---? Oh, really? Well, you are correct in your assumption. Let's tie them all together (for the sake of imagination), shall we?
The first drafts of both the Declaration of Independence and The Constitution were written on hemp paper. Thomas Jefferson compared hemp and tobacco saying that, "The former article is of first necessity to the commerce and marine, in other words to the wealth and protection of the country. The latter, never useful and sometimes pernicious, derives its estimation from caprice, and its value from the taxes to which it was formerly exposed". And yet, tobacco is still legal, regardless of the fact that it contributes absolutely nothing to our society. Hemp, on the the other hand, has been criminalized bc it can be "used for recreational purposes". I'm not even going to go into the irony of allowing a useless plant to be legal while criminalizing the cultivation of another plant that's uses are far-reaching. Wait... yes, I am.

Industrial hemp can be used for everything from paper to clothing to rope. The oils can be used for everything from cooking to machinery lubrication to digestive aids. The only real downside to hemp is the fact that it's so versatile. I know that sounds crazy but, we don't want a "superplant" that might make the timber, oil and drug companies work for their money, do we? I mean- America's about depriving the many for the sake of the few, right? Wait, no that's not right. In fact, it's corporate corruption at it's "un-finest". Grrr. So, let's recap why these corporations invoked the media shitstorm that involved "Reefer Madness" (a movie that is complete propaganda and still hilarious when you're -ummm- firing the devil- ;}). Note: These thoughts may be slightly opinionated yet, still food for thought. When I say opinionated, I mean sarcastic and blunt. Hehe.

(P) Big Pharmaceutical- As previously stated, our country is addicted to being addicted and it's largely in part to the drug companies themselves. With "head doctors" wielding terms like "borderline personality disorder" and "social anxiety", everybody can be prescribed their own special concoctions of debilitating chemicals with little to no "real" problem at all. This allows the "general public" to become "consumer/customers" for Big Pharm. If a natural cure for anxiety, depression, hyperactivity, psychosis and discontent were introduced, who would feel it in their "paychecks" first? That's right- the drug pushers (and let's not get confused- legal or not, if you peddle drugs then, you're a dope dealer).

(O) Big Oil- Rope was originally made from animal and plant fibers. When we figured out how to turn oil into plastic and plastic into rope, Big O jumped on board. Why not? One more way to pad their pockets, right? You know, besides dumping liquefied waste into mobile sewage burning factories (vehicles). Currently, we're so wrapped up in foreign trade conflicts that gasoline costs us about 5 bucks a gallon (on average). Let's not even remember that we have more than enough of this disgusting crude (in/on our own land) to keep us moving for decades. Did you remember to keep forgetting? Good.

(T) Big Tobacco- I'm not even going to give a mile long dissertation on the harmful effects of cigarettes, cigars and "chaw". Anyone, that knows me personally, knows that I've been wrestling with nicotine addiction since I hit puberty. I will, however, ask one question. How long would tobacco remain popular if another "smokable" (that actually served a purpose) was legalized?

Alright, time for me to roll it up for now. Oops, I mean wrap it up. <jk> As I said before, this "note" is my opinion. I am actually against immediate legalization. Decriminalization? Yes, let's stop incarcerating people who partake in a natural substance that a)doesn't cause violence, b)doesn't kill by overdose, c)isn't physiologically addictive and d)encourages natural bodily functions (aka eat and sleep). Some might argue that "it" makes you stupid. Guess what, America, we already are stupid. Science has shown that more than two hours of TV a day literally "rots" your brain (actually, it atrophies certain areas). We are "cared for" by machines. We ingest every harmful thing we can find (pretty much) and we blame it all on everyone and everything else. It's time to face reality and accept responsibility, people. We are to blame for our problems... not a harmless little (multi-purpose) plant.

IS To Begin
In the beginning, there was an idea- a sort of random misplaced thought. There was no form nor function, but simply- an undefined 'it', which existed. It began to realize. At first, it figured out that it differed from what it wasn't. This realization of contrast created a loose structuring of categorical facts. It was not what was not it. It is what it is, indeed. Identity was borne on these principles. With the advent of identity came the blooming of comparison. It is not exactly what it is not, but it may be slightly similar. If it and what it was not were to identify with each other, then it might understand it better. Thus, attraction was instituted in a system of balance and disarray. And with this new found motion, a world of possibilities evolved in orderly chaos. It is. It is not. What it is is not what what it is not is. What it is is like what it is not but it is not what what it is not is like. What it is not is what it is not nor is what it is not like what what it is not is not like. What is it? Is what it is really what it is or is what it is really what it is not when what it is not is only like what it is? Was it? Is it? Now, it is...

Chival-really

Yeah, I hold doors for ladies, especially older ladies ( I like that look of surprise in their eyes when the cover they judged doesn't match the content of the book). Chivalry's not dead- it's more like a polite ninja. Hehe. I try to watch the cussing around women, seniors, clergy and children (as for my friends, they can fucking put up with it if I'm standing shitass naked in the middle of the motherfucking street, drunk and singing whatever Gdamn song is rambling through my brain. Deal with it, bitches. ;}) And since I'm talking about talking, I really try to listen to what people have to say. Which means I try not to interrupt, change topics without acknowledgement or talk over someone- even if they're being stuckin' fupid. Hey, I'm antisocial- but I try. I do try... mostly. I really don't call people names too much either. Ok, maybe a little bit when I'm irritated. And I'm even trying to watch that- my temper. So, <ahem> yay me, right?</ahem>

Here's what I don't do: I don't leave the toilet seat up. I know, I know, some of you ladies are saying- oh wow, that is awesome! But, before you start wistfully dreaming about never "falling in" again, please realize that I put the lid down, too. You want to know why? Germ dispersal- that's why. The vortex action of a flushed "terlet" creates a high velocity mist cannon of piss and sh*t molecules that can spray up to thirty feet. That's right, your "privy materials" are coating the walls of your "wash" room. Gross. Put the lid down. If it makes you feel any better, ladies, you can still take comfort in the fact that you're only lifting half what men should (and stop leaving your used feminine products in plain sight- PLEASE!). Regardless, if "the lid" didn't have a purpose, it wouldn't be part of the "ensemble".

And since we're talking about "seats", I will give my seat to a lady. Old, young, mother, femnazi- I don't care. Have my seat. I especially feel bad for women in heels. I mean, yeah, they make your legs sexy but, ouch, right? How do you wear those things? Please sit down... and hold the remote, too. If I don't like what you're watching, I'll leave. TV is stupid. TV makes you stupid. I got things to do. All in all, what I'm saying is- I may not be a "gentle" man (admittedly and you know it) but I'm most definitely a gentleman. I take care of ladies. Don't hate me bc I'm "old-fashioned" or whatever. Recognize. And if you got a problem- maybe you need to learn what manners really are. They're respect and courtesy (hopefully, mutual). A lady is a lady is a lady- and if you "ain't a lady", I'm slamming that door in your face (metaphorically- or not). G'day to you...


//------------------------------------//

Rants (Rated R)
*If you're less than 18 years of age, I prefer that you discontinue reading.

No...

 Listen, you idiot geniuses... if you can't come up with anything but a negative response, shut the hell up until you create a counterpoint. To discredit a theory or opinion simply by stating that (in your opinion) I "might be wrong"- does nothing to validate your hypothesis. It could very easily be countered with, "No, you are." This (at some "elementary" level) is illogical (I mean "I'm rubber, you're glue" comes next, right?). Sarcasm, double talk and circular reasoning are not effectual returns on legitimate issues. If and when a statement lacks any kind of "back up", then, opening your gapped flappers does nothing but waste my time. This also includes the inevitable "Captain Obvious" characters who most certainly know where your mind is and still say stupid things like, "You know, if I were you, I'd have done it differently". Thanks, azzhole... tell me that you're intelligent enough to recognize my mistakes and instead of helping out, you imply that maybe you think you'd respond a little better in a past scenario (my past). Gee, why don't you go tell Jesus he should stand up for himself at the crucifixion, huh? You know, if hindsight is twenty/twenty and you feel the need to comment on what I've said or done, then you've already lost the argument. I'm looking forward, fukknutz. Turn your train of thought around and maybe suggest ways to improve the present rather than condemning the past and its consequences. Listen to pessimists and neurotics some time. Ever notice how 90% of their sentences begin with no or I? (Go ahead and argue that numerical estimation, dipshitez.) All in all, if you can't input anything other than your solipsistic BS opinions, I don't want to hear from you, at all. Remember, existentialism is only a true reality when you're alone. Otherwise, you suddenly learn there are situations you can't control. Like getting punched in the mouth and never speaking to me again (which, as far as I'm concerned, would always be an improvement). So, back it up or shut it up, before it's done for you...
PS you don't know me.

NLOL Pets
  
Alright, so... I don't have a problem with the pics of dogs in hats, cats making goofy faces, etc. The pictures are usually pretty funny; and, on occasion, I have laughed out loud. What bothers me is that the editors of said comical photos feel it's necessary to provide their pets with grammatically incorrect captions. Why? Is there some deep rooted need to ensure your "superior" intelligence by intentionally portraying your furry friends as inferior linguists? Sure, they remind you of children and children often speak with improper syntax. Sure, you have probably never actually had a conversation with another species.
   In light of this, how do you know it's not offensive? Maybe your "best friend" resents the picture in the first place, and then, you have to go and make idiotic captions like "I can has...". Is it proper to further the portrayal of stupidity or is it your own that forces you to misspell words and jumble grammar? In my opinion, these infantile "additions" to already hilarious pictures just take away from the comedy and force us to see that someone (probably you) is not as intelligent as we hoped. All in all, I'm trying not to be too cynical yet, how can I not when I know that the subjects of these pictures A) probably don't talk like that B) probably resent their owners for demeaning them and C) are most likely much more intelligent than their "owners" believe. So, yoo can has a f**kin' cheezeburger, you  out of shape, hairless primates. And in the next life, I hope you're an adorable feline/ canine genius who is treated like a toddler. - Man's greatest mistake is believing in his superiority without seeking proof...-

Right Barack After This
Alright, this is a disclaimer for those ignorant of my position(s) on certain topics. It reads as follows: If you are offended by the ideas in this blog, then you don't know me and have no right to have an opinion about me. Please, understand that no statement is entirely absolute as there are always exceptions to any rule. So, if you can't say something worth saying, don't say anyt'ing...

Hey, it is so friggin' great that we have a black prez( well, half black). Go team! Wait a minute, something ain't right (and I'm not talking 'bout Barack). Here's this guy who's level headed, cool handed, warm hearted, sharp witted and well, he just seems like a pretty solid dude; yet, all anyone can talk about is the f**kin' color of his skin and how said color applies to everything else about him. Does that seem right to you?
Yes, I understand the trials of the "black" man (and before you start spouting off at the mouth, how old are you? You had better be Rosa.). Look at me. I'm labeled white because I have ancestors who lived in shitty weather and the melanin in their skin adjusted differently, but, I'm cool with that (get it?). I also have three redskins, mick and piker in my ancestry, too. (Oh no, what do you do with a mutt?!) 
Regardless, I do understand that what the "white" man did to the "black" man was deplorable, humiliating, heartless, cruel, etc.; but, can the continuation of an "eye for an eye" kind of vengeance be healthy in the long run? Do you consider it hypocrisy to despise someone’s forefathers for acts of violence, then turn around and scream," kill whitey"? Guess what- people (as a species, mind you) are all f**ked up to one another. You're living on land you stole from my ancestors, the injuns. Your supplies and goods are shipped on railroads built on the sweat and blood of the Chinese. Have you ever seen Gangs of New York? Pretty interesting expose (though it could have been longer)... And, that's not even mentioning the hard working "brown" people who continually provide extremely efficient and ridiculously cheap labor to their northern neighbors. 
However, all the previous rambling boils down to this- We are Americans. We accept anyone who's been born here and lots that haven't. It's the great sushi wok with chitlins, potatoes and carne asada (hehe). United we and divided we, comprende? I just want to know if the perpetuation of distinction based on color (in any regard) is logical. Medically, there are a few differences that lie in certain risk factors but, aside from those, we are no different. We are all red on the inside. We all eat, sleep, f**k, piss and shite.
Please, stop the self imposed segregations. Now that we got the man in the house shaded differently (see how stupid that sounds), you know what this means, right? It means there should be no more whining, that's what it means. No more race cards for court cases, no more telling people not to say things you call your best friend, no more lenience for laziness, no more talking about how the man is always "getting you down". It's time to step up (whatever hue may be you) and be "the man". Our president is an excellent example of America and it has nothing to do with his multiracial heritage, except to those who were raised to see color as an undeniable classification protocol. So, who are you with no excuses left? Is it just easier to look for any lame excuse to dislike someone you don't even know?
How about this- every time you see someone you immediately dislike, help them somehow, in some little way. I bet it could change the world ( at least yours) more than you ever know. Oh, and I don't like you because you have a circulatory system.

PS Good luck, Mr. President... I know that the road ahead is a difficult one for many reasons-  and I wish you the best. Remember, Solomon chose wisdom and got it all...

Anorexiuggh
Hey, what the hell is happening to the women/ girls of America? Do you really think looking like a Qtip is appealing? No curves and no shape makes you look like a prepubescent male. That's right, you look like little boys. What happened to being healthy? Hmmmm... exhaustion. It quite possibly could be caused by lack of nutrients and circulation. Seriously, you f**kin' pencil, I wouldn't pick you up to write a hate letter to whomever put the stupid thoughts in your head that weighing less than your laundry is attractive. Perhaps, this new found addiction to nothingness is the reason behind the big teacup chihuaha fad. I suppose, you couldn't hold a real dog or it might snap your tiny twig of a wrist. Watch the poor thing shiver for the same reason you do. Isn't it funny how you have a girl who wishes she was smaller clutching a dog who wishes it was larger?
So, I take you out to a nice restaurant and you order a godd*** salad? You coulda saved me an eight dollar glass of water and said, "let's just go to Walmart and get a head of lettuce." That'd be like three dinners so, you wanna be a lady and give it up(j/k)? Or you could eat worms and mud pies, little boirl. Regardless, you bulimiarexics make me really hungry just looking at you. Your dog would probably be more nutritious. Hey, since you're saving all this money not eating, why don't you do one of those adopt-a-kid commercials? Oh wait, that won't work. First, donors might send your parents money and second, you're jealous of those kids, aren't ya?
So, are you angry yet? Is it working up an appetite? NO, sticking your finger down your face does not help you at all and you're wasting food, money and my time. Maybe you could get some work at Mass with the way you look 'cuz you sure as hell ain't holding my candlestick. Regardless, eat something so I can see you or stay the hell out of my way, little man(s).

FemNazi FauxPas
Hello, and welcome to an awakening, if you will. Those of you that do not know me will draw irregular conclusions upon my character and/or political correct-itude.
I open doors for little old ladies. Now, I'm not biased towards the geriatric; but, they do take precedent. However, if one more self righteous girl-power type slings looks of pure contempt my way, I may just let the door slam in their face. Don't walk through the door I'm holding for you and hate me for it, ya ignorant c***.
Oh yeah, and just because you have a void between your legs doesn't mean you can check out during lovin', either. I'm not your average bear, boo boo. I'll either boot ya the f**k out or make you move, if ya can catch that meaning. It's not about being a super slut, either; just be comfortable in your skin, for god's sake. I like it in the dark and, more so, in the light. I like it hot, wet, sticky and exhausting. Don't waste my time being self conscious about how you look 'cuz you'll look all kinds of different later, anyway.
Hey, why the hell do you try to assert your rights as a lesbian and then, try your damndest to look like a guy? I mean, there's uni-sexy and then there's- dude... go ahead and dress how you want, of course, but don't do something just to seem like something. If you are, you are. You look dumb pretendin' to be yourself... 

Death Taxable
I pay good money for my slow death. My lack of air is, apparently, a priority in my mind; although, my lack of extra funds is ... necessity? I can gasp like an eighty year old man going up a hotel stairwell as long as I got me a lighter for that puff at the top. Who knows, if I keep smoking tobacco laced with pesticides, maybe it'll keep the mosquitos off my face when I'm not riding the mountain bike I got from the cigarette sweepstakes. Poetic injustice. Oral fixation, addictive carcinogen, AD(H)D, pretty blue tendrils of happiness and fire. My mouth is like the f*ckin' Gobi, my clothes smell like a woodstove and my elite sense of taste left with the last little bit of my circulation. That's right, my feet get cold sometimes. Big whoop, wanna fight about it? Hey, good thing my perception is altered and/or my mood is mellowed... (ha). Hey, @zzholes... have you ever smoked a cig after a brawl and it makes you wanna puke? Take the hint. Irish be my blood and smoking increase the redness of my head (add drinking, ah forget it) and I look like a match-head 'bout to spark. Could I bum a square, my friend? It's a very simple question, roiyt? The irony is in the prick who says No because he wants them for himself. I punish you by not providing you with the means to further your self-inoculation of carcinogenic material. "Smokes" IS money, in many places. They provide solace to the lonely, a break to the overworked, and an icebreaker for millions of losers worldwide. I may be the only one who could compare 'em to foreign oil policies but, I digress (now you should, too)...Regardless, oft times we find ourselves stubbing a quid without recalling the lighting of the da*n t'ing in de first place, mon. The previous sentence was a global idea or blank fill something. Hey, gov’t guys, invest in something that provides the fringe benefits of tobacco without the negative sides (like mashed potatoes and emphysema or macaroni and ch-ancer.). Whatever, at today's prices I can eat, smoke, drink or drive on five bucks. What?! No, no, goodnight...     

Core Rejuvenation
It's a great big circle. Everything is everything and it all spins round, from inner molecular components all the way to the cosmos themselves. It could be possible that everything spins according to a certain predestined value; but, then again, said value could be set as counterbalance or equilibrium. I suppose that's why we have so many rotational niche phrases: i.e. love makes the world go ..., what goes a... comes a..., we don't like your kind ... here, etc. Even though most buildings are rectangular in shape, you still go a... the corner a... dinner time to look a... for some grub, right? Centrifugal and centripetal, kinetic, potential, yes, maybe and so on and so forth. Spin your laundry, your tires, a yarn, and most importantly, before spinning, you can sit... nah, just kiddin' ( a colloquialism popped up, big whoop wanna fight about it?!). Regardless, it only takes a push to throw an orbit through, it only takes a pop to stop a twisted drop. Turtles and helicopters- cogitate this meditation. Fall face first and rise repeatedly. Plenty long time making friends with circles and triangles, you asymmetrical funkenheimers. Wormy waves, control the flop and the fall. Peace out, panzies.

Shut Up And Drive, Hilton Wanna-bes
So, currently, I drive whole bunches for work. I know, I know... It's not you you should be worried about, it's the other drivers. Well, guess what, you chowder-heads are all idiot drivers to me. Let me define chowder...
1) Cell phones- one hand on the wheel, one head up the @$$ (and if you're texting- that ain't write)
2) Sandwich dogs- can't wait 'til you wreck and your sweet lil' Muffincakes gets crushed between you and the steering wheel
3) Turn signals (lack of)- I know you think you're King shitre but you're really just a pile 'bout to cause a pile up
4) Erratic speeds- ever hear of cruise control, grandma? You pull out in front of me burning rubber and then, you slow down? AAAAAAgggggggghhhh...
5) Mastication- won't it be funny when the autopsy shows half an uneaten dollar menu burger stuck in your nose
6) Cosmetic application- endangering the responsible so you can try to pretend you're flawless
 And last but not least...combinations of the above. You got Poopie the puppy in your lap, a burger in one hand, a cell phone in the other and you're changing lanes without signaling while tuning the radio(or your MP3) at eighty miles an hour. Are you serious? Is your life worth mine? No, shut up and drive. Stay outta my frickin' way, beetches.

123=ESI
Shamanistic Alchemy. Hmm? I frown as I contemplate the intense magnitude of those words. Yes, I said intense not immense. I suppose it might describe an amalgamation of the egocentric self-perpetuity complex spiced with some tribal dispositions and a few sprinklings of ignorance induced outbursts. However, I believe that the true definition exists more as a perpetual mindset rather than a definitive destination. Everything is everything but don't stop there. What are dreams made of exactly? Could we say imagination, memory and emotion? Or maybe we could say fancy, fantasy, fear and forgetting? Nah, let's opt for... Dreams Are Really Everything. Dare to do it, do it to it, get it with it, get it in it, do the do and yeah, you too... you are it and it is, too.
 
I, Zy, Try
This disclaimer pertains to all individuals with whom Zyris communicates:
I am an Alchemist, though not in the socially accepted definition. This incomplete definition is but part of the whole. I study life. I seek true reality and savor knowledge as some would obsess over gourmet cuisines. I do not seek the erratic principles and deviant logics of the masses. Those truths to which I adhere are those that, in most cases, have been fundamentally imbued into our collective consciousness (not the whims of trend and fancy). As a student of the world in its entirety, there are times in which I may appear to "misunderstand". Sometimes, as a fallibly finite being would, I misinterpret. Many times, however, it seems that those who think they've "figured me out" are the ones who are farthest from the truth. I am an intensely intellectual, intensively inspired individual. If you profess to know me (as you should if you think you understand), then you should know that I quite often mean exactly what I say. Your misinterpretation is usually involved with your malformed ideas of my morals, my mind or my method of delivery. I care so much for people as a whole, you couldn't even imagine the magnitude (I can't, anyway); however, those persons, who desire to convey their thoughts, would do well to bear in mind these idea(l)s: intensity is a difficult issue with me, intelligence is a mandatory requirement when in judgment and if you speak illogically/irrationally/incompletely/insufferably- then expect to deal with the intensity. I am struggling with my (assumed) inability to communicate- continuously. Be quite sure your words have substance to them, or they shall be scattered like trash in the streets... Thank you and have a day. Good night.

Fat Asses: Boon Of The Fittest
It all stems from bad parenting. You could say that about any deeply ingrained societal problem. A new parent doesn't know how to stop the infant's cries and, thus, uses the only solution apparent, shove something in the hole. This action creates a psychological dependency on food as comfort and solace early in a child's development. Throughout adolescence, a child may continue to seek mastication as a pacifying agent. This behavior, mixed with the hormonal fluctuations of puberty, can significantly increase factors such as obesity, glandular malfunction, heart instability and many more. When these factors manifest, the child's (adolescent) health may be considered "at risk". Sub-par anything means weakness. Handicap placards are handed out with welfare checks.

It is entirely feasible today for the aforementioned adolescent (becoming an adult) to roll off their couches, wheeze thirty feet to their van, drive to a grocery store (after getting welfare check/SSI at trailer court mailboxes), park in the closest possible space (handicap placard), wobble thirty feet to the motorized shopping cart, drive around inside the supermarket retrieving their food, pay with welfare check, drive cart to van, get grocery boy to load groceries and take cart, drive home and stuff more shit in their faces.

Total distance traveled: 90 feet   
I mean, come the f*** on, are you kiddin’ me?

Double Standards
Personally, I've had enough of this "self-righteous segregation". Whether it be sexist or racist, segregating your "minority" by attacking the actions of the "opposition" is ridiculous. Anybody ever hear of "an eye for an eye makes the world blind"? Ladies, if you want men to treat you with equality, stop acting like "mother superior" (please take note of the lowercase). There have been mistakes made in the past, by chauvinism and racism, but, how is degradation and blame an effective countermeasure? The media now portrays the "average" man as a needy simpleton, while the feminine archetypes become more and more cynical, controlling and judge-mental. None of these archetypes are helping our goals of equality. Really, the surest way to counteract equality is...act as if there's a difference. You can't have your cake and eat it, too.
More and more, we see women that demean the actions of men, regardless of the true nature of said actions. No, infidelity and ignorance are not that about which I'm speaking.
If we are to evolve, we must encourage positive and constructive ideals of "togetherness", rather than the immature "don't get mad, get even" philosophies that are so prevalent today. Yes, women and other "minorities" were treated as inferior in the past. No, it wasn't right. However, treating the "former aggressors" with disdain is just as reprehensible, if not more so. So, instead of "telling" men or "white people" that they screwed up and they now "owe" for their actions (or the actions of their forefathers), why not practice what you preach? Lead by example or fail in your "implied" goals. "Real" men do not need "guidance". "Real" people do not want reparations for "past mistakes". Balance will only be found for communities when the individuals involved... STOP THINKING ABOUT THEMSELVES AND START THINKING ABOUT US "ALL".


Misduhwrecktions
Why does it seem that we continuously point fingers at the people that surround the people that offend us, rather than the offenders themselves? We have protest groups picketing soldiers' funerals, LGBT groups demanding Apple remove an "anti-gay" app, others that blame illegal aliens for unemployment and, of course, let's blame the President for our perceived "inconveniences" (the list goes on and on). WTF? Have we truly become a nation of "weaklings and playboys" that deliberately confront the "friends of our enemies"?

Clock Aft Menu

I hold most doors; put the lid down. I watch my words. Keep a smile handy. I know enough- to know too little. So, believe you me- I give a ----. There is a way- it must be done. This experience becomes submersive. What do I mean? I imply vague assertions. What are they now? My pen is stronger; my mind- a razor. 'Dull' need not apply. Does this make sense. My ragged voice falters; my weary limbs ache. Time is lost, talking...